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This blog is all about jokes and random thoughts. Don't look for deep insight or thoughts on current events..This is just to make me and my friends laugh and hopefully a few others as well.

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Attraction of Deception

A wife happily back home and breaks good news to
Her husband, "Remember those 'not tonight honey I
Have headache' I have been having all these years?
Well, they are gone."

"No more headaches?" the amazed husband inquires,
"How is that, my darling wife?"

His wife replies, "I had mercy on you, so I took advice
From Manisha and went to a hypnotist. He told me to
Stand in front of a mirror, stare at myself and repeat 'I
Do not have a headache; I do not have a headache, I
Do not have a headache.' It worked! The headaches
Are all gone. Good for you."

The husband replies, "Well, we are back in game that
Is wonderful."

His wife then says, "You know, you have not been exactly
A ball of fire in the bedroom these last few years. Why do
Not you go see my hypnotist and see if he can do something
For that chill in you?"

The husband agrees to try it. Following his appointment, the
Husband comes home, rips off his clothes, picks up his wife
And carries her into the bedroom. He puts her on the bed
And says, "Do not move, I will be right back."

He goes into the bathroom, comes back a few minutes later
In the bedroom, jumps on top of her, and makes a passionate
Love to his wife like never before.

His wife exclaims, "My love that was delightful!"

The husband says again, "Let's continue, and do not move!
I will be right back."

He goes back into the bathroom, comes back for round two
And by golly it was even more exciting than the first time.

The wife sits up and her head is spinning.

Her husband again says, "Do not move, I will be right back."

With that, he goes back in the bathroom. This time, his wife
Quietly follows him and there, in the bathroom to see the
Hypnotic therapy, she sees him standing at the mirror naked
And saying, "She is not my wife. She is not my wife. She is
Not my wife!"

posted by Thundar # 10:07 PM 0 Comments

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Blondes

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started."

Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster."

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the boxe able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster."

He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then ." he said with a deep sigh, . .. . ... . ...

"Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box."

cid:1.2711099039@web51409.mail.re2.yahoo.com

posted by Thundar # 1:43 PM 0 Comments

Tuesday, March 03, 2009

Homesick

Ahkmed the Arab came to the United States from the Middle East and he was
only here a few months when he became ill. He went to doctor after doctor,
but none of them could help him. Finally, he went to an Arab doctor who said:

"Take dees bocket, go into de odder room, poop in de bocket, pee on de poop,
and den put your head down over de bocket ahn breathe in de fumes for ten
minutes."

Ahkmed took the bucket, went into the other room, pooped in the bucket, peed
on the poop, and bent over and breathed in the fumes for ten minutes.

Coming back to the doctor, he said, "It worked. I feel terrific! What was
wrong with me?"

"You were homesick," said the doctor

posted by Thundar # 1:01 PM 0 Comments